Last week, we noted that intentionally discipling our children means helping them put off the old man. Putting off the old man begins with the birth of the new man in salvation. So, we must present the gospel to our children regularly, beginning immediately. After salvation, we train them that the cross demands their lives, a living sacrifice for God (Romans 12:1-2).
Intentional discipleship also means helping our children renew their minds. Even the minds of the most sheltered children are corrupted by sin. This world’s thinking and philosophies, pushed through music, movies, and social media, further ingrain this corruption. As a result, Ephesians 4 indicates that putting off the old man is not enough. Our children must also be renewed in their minds. Middle school boys picture this need in a unique way. For whatever reason, they become shower adverse. As they grow into men, they begin to smell like men. They sweat and stink. Far too many of them rectify this by changing their clothes and using an inordinate amount of body spray. Yet, we all know this only exacerbates the problem. These middle school boys, seeking to cover their stench with body spray, serve as a vivid picture of those who seek to put off the old man but don’t renew their minds. Like the middle school boys, they need a shower. Just this time, it is a shower for the mind.
Renewing our minds happens as we wash our minds with the Word of God (Ephesians 5:26). As parents, we must intentionally help our children renew their minds by regularly teaching them God’s Word. This is not something that God has left for the church or the youth pastor to do, but is a responsibility that He has placed squarely on the parents’ (specifically the father’s) shoulders. In Proverbs 1:8-10, we see a clear picture of a father teaching his son the wisdom of God’s Word. In Ephesians 6:4, God commands fathers not to exasperate their children, but instead to raise them by instructing them in God’s Word. Parents who do not intentionally spend time in God’s Word with their children should not be surprised when their children do not value God or His Word and are, therefore, marked by foolishness.
This intentional discipleship begins in the home. Without question, the best thing Heather and I did in raising our boys was to have a regular family Bible time, beginning when they were not even able to read themselves. One need not have a master’s degree in theology to pull this off. The resources available to parents today are plentiful. I will include a list of recommended resources at the end of this letter.
Intentional discipleship also involves a commitment to God’s people. Over and over, I am amazed at parents who do not prioritize the regular gathering of God’s people on Sunday, only to be shocked when their children show no interest in church. If you don’t prioritize God’s people, your children will not care about God’s people. Hebrews 10:19-25 reveals that regular church attendance is vital in raising godly children. Your children will survive not being on the club sports team that takes them all over the state on Sunday. Your children will not develop a passion for God if they are always away playing sports. Camping with the family is a good thing. Camping with the family every Sunday in the summer and being away from church sends the message to your children that God is not a priority in your family. Don’t be shocked when they don’t make God a priority in their life.
In short, intentional discipleship falls on the parents’ shoulders. You must bring God’s Word to them regularly. You must intentionally teach them the things of God. You must demonstrate that God is vital for wisdom. You must prioritize the gathering of God’s people. Without it, you cannot raise wise children who fear the Lord. Even if your children are almost out of the home, it is not too late to start these things!